Prima oh prima

Monday, April 03, 2006

Prima oh prima

What is the connection between prima and this picture? Heck..I dunno..i just like the view...

He woke up this morning and I immediately asked him..*Dun dogum gunun. Bugun ne yapacagiz?* (Yesterday was ur birthday. What shall we do today?) ...and I continued *Prima birakacagiz!!* (we wont be using prima-diapers anymore!). He tried to show a brave face even though he was scared.I could sensed it. I brought him to the loo and tried to persuade him gently to do his small business. He tried half heartedly. Then, the sister woke up and gave him all the encouragement she could. He said he couldnt. Ok. We'll try next time I said. We did several trips...all to no avail. All that time, I was being extremely gentle and persuasive (very unlike me) as to not to scare him. He looked ok with it though he still did not release the small stream that i expected him to.

I brought him to the bedroom and collected the unused diapers. I showed him the diapers and told him to say *bye bye* to them. He looked ok at first. He said bye bye...and a second later......he was heart wretchedly sobbing... I held him in my arms as he cried the saddest cry one can imagine. I was reminded of the time when I made him stop breast feeding...too heartbreaking for me...And from the bed, his sister was trying to comfort him with words. His crying stopped after some time but the sadness lingered for some time.

Again, I brought him to the loo. He tried but couldnt released it. Therefore, I sent him to the living room for breakfast. While in the kitchen, he came to me and showed me that a small area of his pants was wet..not much just a spot. Quickly, I brought him to the loo. *yapamam* (I cannot do) he said a few times. We went out of the loo. Then again we tried and finally especially with the sister's encouragement...YES!!! Baddin made a history!!

I thought he would tell me the next time he needed to go to the bathroom. I was wrong. After lunch, I brought him to the loo for a try. He said he could not do it. But the next minute after we came out of the loo, he came to me AGAin with his pants WET!! I would really love to explode but I thought that it would only scared him. So I managed to put my temper under control.

We went out after that...remote car playing in the apartment's car park area..We came back and again, I brought him to the toilet. The same thing again happened. *No toilet anne* he said. *ok..out you go* and not half a minute later...he DID THE SAME THING AGAİN!!!! I lost it then...I started getting angry at him.....scolded him verbally...washed his parts and below..and left him to the room as the dad tried to lecture him and I cooled my temper. He kept crying wanting me all the time. I hugged him ..and everything was cool after that..I was sweet again to him after that and perhaps he wanted to win my heart again he was sweet to me too..

He did his small business two times after that. He told the sister quietly that he needed to go and the sister would tell me...maybe scared of me? I dunno...or maybe he trusted his sister more than me? That is highly possible...

DEfinitely Emotionally exhausted of today's ordeal, he slept at 5.30pm..he is still sleeping now. How will go through tonight..i dunno..will he tell me whenever he needs to go? we will see...when will he wake up?? that is a question i am wondering myself...but i am sure of this...tonight cant be easy...he may decide to wake up at 12 midnight and stay till morning....most definitely, our night toilet travel will be not less...mybe I should bring the bed to the bath tub and sleep there? That is not a bad idea after all...

I hope he will get used to going to the toilet and telling me about it before doing it in the pants...He is scared of this new experience.. this is a big step for him..I do realize that.. I keep reminding myself not to be too insistent on him..not to coerce him or lose my temper...I should let him take the step at his own pace...I only wish his steps are much quicker than now...after all he is already 4 years old!!

----------------me again -------------
12 midnight...
he woke up at 10pm. Pants all wet. Arghhhhhhhh. My favourite blanket all wet!!! Then after dinner, again the same thing.. Ever since that I think we have made at least 10 times trips to and pro the loo. Wait...he says he wants to go....

--------------me again ----------------

Yes...for the first time after he woke up he did it.. the record now is 5 times wet pants and 4 times proper loo....and the night is still on...the fight is just starting..........i really dunno when he will sleep. Even if he sleeps.... i still have to constantly wake up and the chances of the bed cover being wet is too high...*yawn*..i am sooooo sleepy...today has been too stressful...physically and emotionally...

He thinks that when he let out that stream of yellow liquid, that liquid is going home to his mummy...I have to hand it to him though...he has a system...he pulls down the pants himself, sits down on the toilet bowl, tries to do it, lets me wash his private part with water, dries it up with the tissue paper, steps down, pulls up the pants , wears his slippers, flushes the toilet, and finally washes his hands..that is of course when he manages to let it go. The big business -he is still not doing it....and i am not forcing him... let him take his own time...that is if i dont explode first...and he is running out of pants...i suppose i need to make a trip to the next street shop....soon..very very soon...

Please Pray for me...